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Valentines Day Blues


Happy Valentines Day! This is a message for some of you that might be feeling some Valentine’s Day Blues today, but I pray that you take this message and keep it in your heart every day of the year…


If you’re feeling bitter and overwhelmed from all of the (seemingly) “happy couples’” Valentine’s Day posts on social media while you are left without a valentine… Before you start blaming God and questioning God why all these other people have relationships and you don’t, keep these things in mind:


First of all, how do you know that God was the one responsible for bringing these couples together? Not every relationship has been ordained by God (in fact, most of them probably are not.) How do you know that God told these people to marry each other and how do you even know that they are “soulmates” that will be together forever? (I mean, the divorce rate speaks for itself.) My point is that you could be sitting here and being angry towards God for something that He had nothing to do with and jealous of other people that are completely out of the will of God. And if any of those relationships are indeed God-ordained, then hey, PRAISE GOD! It shows that He is still hearing our cries for marriage and He is still working in bringing Christ-like men and women together.


Also remember that if you want your future marriage to be a true reflection of Christ, it will require time, patience, prayer, and a lot of dying to your flesh on your part. The reality is that many modern relationships are not a reflection of Christ and they do not keep Him the center of their relationship (not judging, just stating a reality).


True love goes far beyond the surface of flowers & chocolate and cute V-day posts on social media. There are a lot of spiritual and emotional investments and sacrifices that go into Godly marriages that social media won’t show you.


Just because you are still waiting for your spouse does not mean that God will never bring you one. It does not mean that you are meant to be single forever. It does not mean that God forgot about you. It does not mean that you aren’t deserving of a loving relationship. All it means is that God is still at work and He takes a lot of pride in His work. He takes His time and He is diligent. The plans He has for your life, including who you will marry & when you will marry them, has already been written. What He has for you, will be for you.


Don’t allow the facade of worldly relationships to cloud your vision of seeking the everlasting, Godly marriage that God has for you and is preparing you for. Do not allow that to rush you and pressure you to settle for a worldly relationship. And do not hold it against Him because He hasn’t produced it in your timetable. Love is patient. You can’t rush what you want to last forever. Anyone can have a worldly relationship. Anyone can have a valentine on Valentine’s Day; but a marriage that honors Christ is a divine gift from Him that is worth seeking and worth waiting for, which is worth much more than flowers & chocolate from a temporary Valentine.


So set your eyes on the things above.


Seek first the Kingdom of Heaven and all these things shall be added unto you.”

-Matthew 6:33

6 Responses

  1. Amen! Single christians need to keep praying and believing God to send the right one for them, and that will happen all in His timing. Good word! 🙂

  2. I have been praying for several years now for God to send me a godly woman to be my wife, and I have gotten out there and looked also. The fact that I still have this desire tells me that He must have one out there for me, not to mention the fact that those who pray for me regularly sense this also. I do get exasperated at times, but then I think back to my last relationship and realize that it is a good thing to wait on God. There is a saying, “Don’t drink poison just because you’re thirsty.” The same applies to relationships. Last time I got into one I was lonely, vulnerable, and because I met her in church and because she accepted me despite my past, I thought, “She must be the one!” Nope. Her and I should have just stayed friends instead of launching off into a romance, and it ended badly for both of us. Never again do I intend to make that mistake no matter how much I want to be in a relationship! God’s timing and choices are always right.

    1. Amen! I have learned over the years in my walk with Jesus, that we tend to bring the most hurt and heartache upon ourselves when we step out ahead of God’s timing, instead of learning to just wait on Him. 🙂 There is a wife for you and she is on the way, in Jesus’ Name! 🙂

  3. Amen. I had prayed for love (even before I was a Christian). I wasn’t looking to dive straight into an engagement but I wanted to feel what I was missing. I didn’t love myself, I didn’t feel it from my family when I was younger and even when I got saved I didn’t know how to love yet. God led me and an old friend I used to hang out with that always had a girl hanging on his shoulder to reach out to one another a few years after we met. I always felt this draw towards him in high school, but I was raised to judge others by appearances and I would see him cheating off others people schoolwork and sleeping in class. I assumed he was a bad kid that didn’t care about his education and factor in the girls all swooning over him. I didn’t know he was watching me with admiration when I was drawing in class or hard at work because I was a “teacher’s pet” or longing to talk to me but was afraid of being judged. He was right to be because at the time I would have. But after I had endured a life threatening brain infection, I was humbled. I asked Jesus to come into my heart and I vowed to live for him when He blessed me with a second chance. I did stray for awhile and when my husband who was just a friend of a friend at the time got together with me. We were very selfish. It wasn’t until he took my hand to rededicate our lives to Christ and got baptized with me in a dumpster (to wash away trash of the past) that I realized what agape is. He led me. He showed me how much he cared about me by leading me back to a walk with Christ as he did. He taught me to enjoy the simple things and to let go of hurts and not dwell on negativity. He also showed me what empathy really was. He edified me and supported me. When we started living together though we drifted away from God. It took a lot of trial and error before we finally got our relationship strong and Godly and it came after marriage. Even then we still faced storms but we learned to trust in God and through it He led us through. We knew we were the one for each other that God planned. But the enemy tested our faith and our love for God and one another for most of our life together. My husband and I have special dates we saved for for Valentine’s Day but we express agape love daily throughout the year. I’ll take my husband praying over me for strength and edification over flowers any day. I’d rather go on a fishing trip in the wilderness and read the Bible while we wait for a bite. I’d rather someone hold me accountable for the times I’m tripped up in my walk in Christ than just whisper sweet nothings in my ear. We endured for one another and that is most important of all. Because now we have something so beautiful and blessed, we are 3 cords. It is worth the wait and if God ordained it, it is worth fighting for. Since my husband came into my life, my own family came to know agape love and forgiveness. So much has changed over the years and I thank God for my Godsend no matter what we have had to face.