Masculinity is under attack these days, and has been for a long time. Traditional male-female relationships have been weaponized. There is the so-called “war of the sexes.” Masculinity has been categorized as toxic by progressives who want people to get on board with every type of “alternative lifestyle” except that which is God-ordained. Males are being feminized. Women are becoming increasingly aggressive and foulmouthed. Men, especially if they are conservative and white, are fair game for false accusations of sexual misconduct, which, tragically, makes legitimate allegations of this kind harder to believe. There is more that can be said, but before we discuss Biblical masculinity, is there in fact a form of masculinity that is toxic? The answer is, unfortunately, yes.
Middle-aged and older men, in particular, can remember what old-fashioned manhood was supposed to be like. “Big boys don’t cry.” “Don’t whine, suck it up.” “Never show weakness.” “Never be afraid.” “You not only must fight, but if you lose you aren’t much of a man.” (I’ve experienced that!) “If you aren’t a provider then you’re a loser, even if you can’t help being out of work.” “You need to be able to control your woman.” “Never accept a handout.” More examples could be shown, but you get the idea. Some of the examples set forth here are more extreme than others. Old-fashioned manhood was exhibited in varying degrees, some not as over-the-top complete and oppressive as others, but in sum it left a lot to be desired in any degree of display. How many boys and men were emotionally damaged or even traumatized by these expectations, especially if pushed at the hands of a harsh and unloving father? And to leftists, this misguided form of masculinity is how they view all maleness! But there is a better way, a form of masculinity that is Biblical. First, the God-given roles of men and women must be understood. Ultimate authority was given by God to men. However, this does not mean that women are inferior to men. They are not inferior. Let’s look at the following Scripture passage:
Genesis 2:18, 21-24: And the LORD God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him”…And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Those of you who are familiar with the King James Version of the Bible will recall the term “help meet.” You see in the NKJV that it is “help comparable,” but in either case, in Biblical Hebrew it is one word, ezer (AY-zer), and according to Strong’s Concordance can mean “help”, “succour”, or “one who helps.” When there is help, assistance or, in this case, partnership is in view. There is no inferiority implied! Further examination of this passage sheds light on the roles of women and men. Families have always been God’s intended building blocks of society. The husband was meant to be the protector and provider for the family as well as its overall leader, while the woman was meant to be the homemaker. Both were to love and discipline their children and to raise them up to worship God. That is a very simplified explanation. Regardless, women are not reduced to staying “barefoot and pregnant” in God’s plan. Women have input in decision-making. They can hold some positions in the Church. If something happens to the man of the house, the woman has to take on his responsibilities. With the high cost of living these days, most women have to work just as the men have to. Females are not intellectually inferior to males, either. However, women are not men. People are seeing this demonstrated in athletic competitions with men who identify as female (transgender) absolutely dominating their biological female competition most of the time. Women are biologically different from men by design. They are the child bearers, not men. They are not as physically large or as strong as men, on average. And so on. So what does Biblical masculinity look like?
Men are to be the leaders of the household and the main (but not the only) leaders in society and in the Church. They are to be protectors unless unable to do so because of age and/or infirmity. This includes protection in the military and law enforcement sense as well as in the sense of protecting families and the vulnerable of society, such as the elderly. They are to be providers if possible. Men can have weaknesses, but both they and women are to address their weaknesses and overcome them. Men can cry and express their feelings, but are not to be wimps in the process. It is also important for men to have respect for women and not treat them as slaves or as objects to gratify their desires. Both men and women have a responsibility to raise their children in a proper, godly manner, but men should have a leading role in this as well. Anyone can experience fear, but it must be overcome by courage, which is not the lack of fear but instead is doing what must be done regardless of fear. Courage is certainly not limited to men, but it is, nonetheless, a Biblically masculine trait. Losing a fight does not make one less of a man, it makes one human. Also, sometimes discretion is the better part of valor. The man who retreats in an unwinnable fighting situation will live to fight—and win—another day. A real man loves the Lord Jesus Christ, submits to Him, and serves Him. Here are some Scriptures which also showcase Biblical masculinity:
2 Samuel 10:9-12: When Joab saw that the battle line was against him before and behind, he chose some of Israel’s best and put them in battle array against the Syrians. And the rest of the people he put under the command of Abishai his brother, that he might set them in battle array against the people of Ammon. Then he said, “If the Syrians are too strong for me, then you shall help me; but if the people of Ammon are too strong for you, then I will come and help you. Be of good courage, and let us be strong for our people and for the cities of our God. And may the LORD do what is good in His sight.”
2 Samuel 1:11-12: Therefore David took hold of his own clothes and tore them, and so did all the men who were with him. And they mourned and wept and fasted until evening for Saul and for Jonathan his son, for the people of the LORD and for the house of Israel, because they had fallen by the sword.
1 Samuel 20:40-42: Then Jonathan gave his weapons to his lad, and said to him, “Go, carry them to the city.” As soon as the lad had gone, David arose from a place toward the south, fell on his face to the ground, and bowed down three times. And they kissed one another; and they wept together, but David more so. Then Jonathan said to David, “Go in peace, since we have both sworn in the name of the LORD, saying, ‘May the LORD be between you and me, and between your descendants and my descendants forever.’ ” So he arose and departed, and Jonathan went into the city.
1 Timothy 2:1-2, 8: Therefore I exhort first of all that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks be made for all men, for kings and all who are in authority, that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and reverence…I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting;…
Ephesians 5:22-33, 6:4: Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband…And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.
1 Timothy 3:1-2a: This is a faithful saying: If a man desires the position of a bishop, he desires a good work. A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife,…
Acts 6:1-4: Now in those days, when the number of the disciples was multiplying, there arose a complaint against the Hebrews by the Hellenists, because their widows were neglected in the daily distribution. Then the twelve summoned the multitude of the disciples and said, “It is not desirable that we should leave the word of God and serve tables. Therefore, brethren, seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business; but we will give ourselves continually to prayer and to the ministry of the word.”
1 Peter 3:1a, 7: Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands,…Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
That should give you a good idea of what Biblical masculinity is. The worldly form of masculinity has toxic aspects to it, but not the godly form of it. God ordained the genders of male and female (no others), marriage to be between one man and one woman, and He also decreed that there be different roles for men and women. Women are not inferior to men, but men are to lead. Men are not to be feminized, effeminate, or “macho.” Men are to be godly and manly, living in submission to Jesus Christ and being what God has called them to be in this world.
