Jamie L. Fore - Testimony

 

Hello, my name is Jamie, this is a testimony, The way I lived before I became a born-again Christian. 

 

I was born in Mississippi. It was my mother, Father, an older sister, and myself. Growing up as a child I would say that I had a normal life. My Father was a hardworking man, and my mother was a stay-at-home mom. Who done everything a mother is supposed to do for her family? We had gatherings with family and friends. Enjoying all the things we had done as a family. As I got older, I noticed that my parents were beginning to have some problems. Several years later we all had a family meeting at the kitchen table and my parents informed us, that they would be making plans to separate. I was devastated and just did not understand but they assured me it was for the best. My father moved out and my mother my sister and I went to live with my grandparents. (My mother’s parents) Soon after that they were divorced. My Mother and my sister and I then moved from Mississippi to Georgia.

 

My mother then took on 2 jobs and was always gone working or at home sleeping. So, life as young kid began. I started going to friends’ houses. Hanging out with older kids. Doing what they done smoking cigarettes, cussing, flirting with boys, and so on. At that age I thought I was doing what all kids were doing and was also trying to fit in. 

 

I ended up meeting an older guy and dating him. My mother was against it, but I went behind her back anyway. By the time I was 17 I had already started smoking cigarettes, cussing, having sex, drinking, smoking pot, taking pills and just being rebellious. When I turned 18, I got married and in no time, I was pregnant with my first child. We were married two yrs. and I got pregnant with our second child. We ended up separating and after our second child was born, we divorced. I had custody of the children I was living with my mom and stepdad. Still doing the same things I had done before going out partying hanging with friends and having a good time. Sometime after the divorce he committed suicide. After that I just continued to get worse, I started doing meth and cocaine. Things just went downhill from there. I started staying gone not taking care of my kids leaving them with my mother. I meet another man that was into the same things I was into. I ended up getting married to him. Things were good for a little while, so I thought. He began to get very violent and started to abuse me. Mentally physically and emotionally. I ended up pregnant again. We divorced shortly after our son was born and once again, I was a single mom of now 3 kids, living in my own home behind my mother’s house. Still on drugs. Trying to hold a job and trying to raise 3 kids. I continued the life of a drug addict. I ended up meeting yet another man. He was on the run from the law he was into drugs way more than I was. I gave him a place to stay and called myself helping him. Boy was I in for it. He was much more of an abuser. Much more on drugs and into unbelievably bad things. We ended up seeing each other and again I was pregnant with now my 4th child. This man beat me. Mentally abused me. I was terrified. He stayed home and cared for the kids while I worked. For 12 long yrs. Yes, we were both still on drugs. I was so afraid of this man I couldn’t make him leave. I was scared to call the law afraid he would get to me before the cops did. He could say BOOO, and I would jump in fear. I have been hit in the face with a gun. My eyes have been blacked I have had a busted nose. Knots in my head from being beat with his fist. Why didn’t you fight back u might ask? Well, I did, and things got bad. Any way after some time he left and yes, I was then a drug addict single mom of now 4 kids and terrified to death of all things. I was scared to go outside my house. 

 

My drug use continued as I went totally and completely out of control. I left my kids with my mother for weeks at time without them even hearing from me. Time went on just like that and my kids went to live with their other grandmother. I was so strung out and had lost custody of all my kids. By law, and by Department of Family and Children’s Services (DFACS). I had to go to rehab. A 1 yr. program 6 months in and 6 months out. With drug test every day and counseling and drug classes from 8am until 7pm every single day. I didn’t want to be there at first but as time went on, I began to enjoy being clean and was glad I was there. I stayed clean for 5 yrs. after I got out of rehab. It all started over. The terrible cycle of drugs and I was even more messed up than I was the first time. I started hanging out with this guy that was into robbing and stealing. He was even homeless lived in his car. What did I do? Yes, I took off with him selling drugs doing drugs in ways I never thought that I would. Living homeless with him stealing with him. Sleeping in the car in the woods in abandoned houses. In the winter freezing to death and in the summer burning up. Nowhere to wash clothes nor to take a bath. We would go steal stuff out of people’s yards, and buildings in the day or at night it didn’t matter. We would sell what we got for just enough for more drugs gas money and a little something to eat and cigarettes. I ended up going to jail twice once for pills and then once for theft by taken we stole a utility trailer he ran I got caught at this time I was about over all this. I would cry because I didn’t want to live that life I wanted to change. I would cry wanting to go home to my kids, but I couldn’t. So, when I went to jail the last time. I was running from the law in the woods I got lost I didn’t even know where I was, I was all alone I just wanted to give up I wanted them to find me I wanted to go to jail and while I was walking circles in those woods for 5 hrs. I feel to my knees, and I said GOD if u will just get me out of here. I don’t care if I go to jail or not put me where I need to be I will live for u and I meant that. So needless to say, as I was lost in the woods. I continued to pray to God and cry out. I began to hear voices in the distance and started trying to follow those voices. As I got closer, I began to holler out trying to get them to hear me. Finally, I noticed they were hollering back at me. I couldn’t see anyone, I just continued following the voices that I heard and kept hollering out to them, and finally I could barley see movement through the thick woods. I continued closer and closer. When I finally came to the opening into the woods, I seen a lot of younger people in this lake swimming and kayaking. I stood there for a minute as to catch my breath. A group of them came over to me at the bank of this lake and ask if I needed help. Remember I was homeless on drugs and was running from the Law. So yes, I am sure I looked pretty rough. So, I said yes, I told them I had got lost in the woods trying to find my little dog. They Helped me into the kayak and paddled me across the lake where they were holding a gathering of some sort. Come to find out it was a church group. They took me to the people that were in charge, as they were trying to get things ready to pack up and go due to a storm coming. There was a lot of confusion at this point, but they had told me to sit and gave me water and said they would help me. Needless to say, I didn’t know that the news and radio had spoken of 2 people a man and a woman that was running from the law. But nevertheless. Without me knowing they called the police and yes, I went to jail. I stayed in jail for about three months in Gordon co. jail then got transferred to Floyd co jail for the remainder of my stay which total was about 8 months. 

 

I was so glad, and I truly thanked God for getting me out of the lifestyle I was in. I began reading my bible and praying. The first thing that I changed about myself while locked up was my mouth. In jail I heard all these women using some intense language and it just unnerved me to the bone. So, I began to stop cussing and using this language that made me cringe. It wasn’t easy, but I did it and today I do not curse. As I was in jail, I learned a very important lesson. God was with me and even though I had no one on the outside to visit me or send me money or write me. My God was there always. I began going to church in the jail. I stayed to myself I read my Bible prayed and cried many nights. I finally heard from my probation officer he said under no circumstances, I had to do my time which was the remainder of probation 300 hundred and something days. I found out my mother had been in a very serious car wreck and had broken her back and couldn’t get around she was in bad shape with that and lots of other health problems. So, I feel to my knees and cried out to God. I was led to write my probation officer a letter and ask if he would reconsider letting me out due to my mother’s health. And within 4 days. I was being released. Praise God. 

 

Upon being released I had no clue where I was going to stay or what I was going to do. So, as they were releasing me, I called my mother who was now living with a friend of hers cause she couldn’t care for herself. So, her roommate agreed to come get me. Not knowing anything about me except the drug use and homelessness and things mom had told him about, I could only stay until I could get into a homeless shelter. I wasn’t able to get into a shelter anywhere and if I would of went back where I came from, I would be back at the old life again and end up in jail again or dead. So, in time David my mom’s roommate seen that I was really serious about living right and Living for God. And he also knew my mother needed or would soon need round the clock care and so he let me stay. He laid down ground rules. Put me on the computer to put in job applications and such. I was so thankful I got the help I needed and didn’t have to go back to my old life. David got me a phone, I was able to contact my kid’s probation and anyone that I needed to. Soon after that mom was in such bad shape, she did have to have round the clock care, David and I went to church as much as we could. So my mother passed in 2015 and we then began to go to church every Sunday and Wednesday night bible study. 

 

Fast forward to today. Now David and I are married. I have a full-time job. He is an ordained minister. I thank God for all he has done for me. It was his love and grace that pulled me out of the mud and the hell that I was in and saved me. I love the Lord and trust and believe in him alone. 

 

So just a side note if you are lost living the life of a sinner. Doing the worldly things of life. Stop and get with someone that can lead u to God. He is much bigger than us and he can do all things regardless what you have done the life you have lived he loves you and he is waiting for you to call out to him.